I think one of the most frustrating things about growing up is looking back on your childhood and realizing how little you were taught about very important things. For example, there is so much about the menstrual cycle that I wish had been a part of my education.
I mean, because menstruation has previously been relegated to a ‘women’s* topic’ the education many of us received was lacking.
But learning about the menstrual cycle is beneficial for everyone, whether you’re supporting a partner or going through it yourself.
So, here are some things I wish I knew about the menstrual cycle as a young dancer.
The Menstruation Cycle’s “Day 1” is the First Day of your Period
Okay, this might sound basic. But I truly was never officially taught this as a kid, and because the menstrual cycle is a cycle, I never understood if my period was the beginning or the end.
This led to many embarrassing moments when I was surprised by my period simply because I wasn’t given the tools to properly track when my period was coming.
Not Every Cycle is 28 Days
While we’re on the topic of cycle days, another thing I failed to learn about the menstrual cycle, is that not everyone runs on a 28-day cycle.
This is an extremely generalized number. More in-depth data shows that the average is actually anywhere between 21-35 days in length! And even that number is generalized as it’s still normal to have a shorter or longer cycle than that.
What’s more, even amongst a single individual the menstrual cycle can vary up to 8 days from cycle to cycle!
And that brings me to my next point…
Tracking Your Period is About More Than Counting
Because cycle length can fluctuate from cycle to cycle, learning how to track your cycle symptoms can help you better predict exactly when Aunt Flow’s plane will land.
Instead of simply counting and approximating, tracking these symptoms can help you identify how to understand where in your cycle you are: flow, mood, energy levels, headaches, digestion, acne, sex drive, cravings/hunger, stress/anxiety, cervical fluid, cramping/pelvic pain, and breast tenderness.
Over time you’ll recognize patterns like,
“Oh, about 5 days before I bleed, I break out.”
“Man, I feel *spicy* when I’m ovulating and my confidence is through the roof.”
Or
“Wow, I am completely exhausted the day before my period every month.”
“Huh, my cycle actually averages 21-25 days in length. Longer than that should be a red flag to me that something is up.”
Recognizing these patterns can help you not only predict your period but can help you recognize when your body is dysregulated so you can make adjustments.
Monthly Bloating is Normal – It’s Not a Lack of Discipline
There is nothing worse than working hard at fueling your body well, dancing 6 days a week, and still getting that old-fashioned yet heart-breaking note,
“HoLd YoUr TUmMy In.”
Getting a note like that can send any dancer into a spiral. But you should know that most times, it’s not about your weight.
Studies show that the menstrual cycle can cause significant changes in body weight – and most women weigh more during their period than they do during other parts of their cycle. This is due to the fluid retention that occurs throughout the luteal phase.
So don’t start cutting calories or doubling up workouts just yet. Instead, see what happens if you increase your focus on rest and recovery. Odds are, you’re body will return to it’s average state in a few days when your hormones shift.
Losing your Period Is A Red Flag
I’m going to admit something really challenging to you, and this confession may be triggering to people who have struggled with an ED.
When I was younger other dancers would often talk about how the “didn’t get their period” because they “exercised so much.”
Now, I had heard about this before. It was always the girls who were super intense into sports or dance, and when it was discussed it was always because they “were SO active.”
It was also always discussed with nonchalance, as if losing your period was inevitable is you were active enough.
Now, as a young overachiever, this always made me feel like maybe I wasn’t working hard enough.
After all, I competed in four events on the track team (winter and spring season) and I danced 10-12 hours per week, and I rehearsed the school musical 10 hours a week.
How much harder were these girls working than me?
It wasn’t until I was much older that I learned that amenorrhea is a sign of a severe energy deficiency and not something to take lightly.
*If you are struggling with amenorrhea, we recommend seeing a medical doctor or nutritionist who can help you find your body’s ideal energy balance.*
PMS is More Than Just a Bad Attitude
Growing up I thought I didn’t suffer from PMS because I didn’t get mean or crabby once a month…or so I thought.
You see, culture taught me that PMS was associated with, well a word that rhymes with “itchiness.”
But actually, PMS is a scientific phenomenon that can also be referred to as your Luteal phase.
As a quick recap, the luteal phase occurs post-ovulation and ends when your cycle starts over again on day one of your period. As the luteal phase comes to a close, estrogen levels remain low and progesterone levels (if not pregnant) also drop to an all-time low. This dip in both progesterone and estrogen yields low energy and mood for many women.
This doesn’t just lead to being crabby. It also means you might feel more emotionally sensitive. You might cry more easily. Feeling overwhelmed may be more common and you might even experience a dip in self-esteem.
When I was young, I would get very emotional each month around the same time. But instead of offering me support, I was taught that I need to “learn to control my emotions.”
Conceal, don’t feel. If you will.
And this by no means gives women a pass to treat others poorly. But learning that this struggle I had was a biological phenomenon and not a behavioral choice, helped me overcome this sensation of being out of control.
Everything Does Not Suck – You’re Just About to Bleed
Along those lines, taking note of when your mood drops by tracking your mood throughout the month might help you get through some challenging emotions.
Have you ever had those days where you think everyone around you is a complete idiot?
How about a recurring feeling that you will never succeed and should make a complete career shift because why would you choose a career filled with constant rejection where no one appreciates your talent anyway?
Or, maybe, you find that you cycle from feeling on-top-of-the-world-productive to feeling like all you want to do is cocoon on the couch.
Try tracking these moods alongside your cycle. You might find that everything does not, in fact, suck. You’re just about to bleed.
Asking for Help With your Period Isn’t Something to be Ashamed Of
It was September in the 7th grade. I had just moved schools and I had only started my period the previous June. That means I only had three periods to practice changing pads and tampons. And, suddenly, I needed to get through a 7 hour school day successfully timing these changes between classes.
As you can imagine, it did not go well.
I was sitting in my final class of the day and I could feel it, I needed to change things out. But I knew my teacher wouldn’t let me leave class so close to the end of school.
And, even though this was my favorite teacher, I was too embarrassed to pull her aside and tell her why I needed an exception to be made.
Instead, I crossed my legs and squeezed them together. At the end of school, I b-lined it straight to my mom’s car, walking without letting my thighs part. When I got home, I showed my mom my shorts, I had bled through but managed to keep it all hidden.
Now, in case no one has ever told you, everyone has bled through their pants, tights, or costume, at one point and it is nothing to be ashamed of!
But what you should be even less ashamed of is asking for help.
Private topics are private, not shameful.
While periods are a topic often handled privately, they are not a topic that should generate any shame for you.
Asking for help or accommodation because you are menstruating is normal and almost a right of passage! Shout out to every girl in the bathroom who gave me, a stranger, a tampon!
Recap
I hope this list was helpful to anyone new to menstruation or just diving into understanding the menstrual cycle.
Overall, I hope this left you feeling less alone and more empowered to conquer the ebb and flow (pun intended) of your monthly cycle!
If you want more cycle information, check out this blog every Monday in September for a new overview of the cycle. And keep your eyes peeled for a special new program designed with the flow in mind.
*Here at DWL we recognize that not all women menstruate and not all people who menstruate are women. That’s why we feel it is important to educate dancers about this topic so understanding our diverse bodies is no longer gatekept. Instead, we hope this education helps everyone – partners, menstruators, post-menstruators, and everyone in between.*
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